Monday, April 24, 2017

Curvy Girl Sex Giveaway!

Photo of April Flores by Nick Holmes
Lots more sexy and juicy photos in the book

So because I am a generous soul, I am GIVING AWAY an autographed copy of my new favorite sex book by sexologist Elle Chase.

This book is AMAZING, and despite the title, you don't have to be a "girl" or curvy to use this book. It works for men, women, and genderfluid people, of ALL shapes and sizes.

It also includes tips for accommodating bad backs, shoulders, gimpy knees... The drawings are wonderful, and the names of the sexytimes positions had me laughing out loud.

Also, I got out a pencil to check off the ones I've tried. Quite a few in the rear view, but with 101 positions, (yes, you sexy beast, that's one-hundred-and-one!) I found many I hadn't. #sexgoals

Curvy Girl Sex delves into anatomy, toys, and many aspects of getting into a sexy mindset. Sometimes we give up on sex, or love, because we think that our [insert bodily imperfection here] means we don't DESERVE sex, or love. No. Lies, damned lies!

We all deserve those things (if we want them). We don't have to give up sex because some parts are extra-large or don't work the way they used to, we just need to know how to accommodate them, and this book shows us how.

^^^ All the this. Being sexy is about being in the moment. Savoring the moment. Instead of worrying that your body doesn't match your porn star fantasy (trust me, I've seen 'em, even THEY don't match that porn fantasy without makeup and lighting and very careful editing), enjoy being with your partners - including yourself.

I know you want this delicious and helpful book. So leave me a comment, and I will pick one commenter at random to receive a copy. (I know, I know, I could use one of those raffle thingies that make you Follow my Twitterfeed and newsletter, but those always annoy the crap outta me, so I'm not doing it to you.)

If you want to sign up for my mailing list, just because I'm nice and you're nice, that would be cool. Link is toward the top right of this page. Because very soon, my Kicking Cancer's Ass memoir is launching, and I know you want to score a copy of that, right?

Note: Will be picking a winner after Friday, April 28, so you still have time. 

Happy sexytimes!

Monday, April 3, 2017

Why Talk About Rape... Again?

Doesn't talking about rape normalize it? Yes, I've heard people ask that.

Well, we've tried not talking about rape and sexual assault for quite some time. And yet, rape and sexual assault didn't magically go away.

I believe that talking about our experiences with rape and sexual assault can be empowering, help lift the stigma, and help us see that we're not alone. Almost every woman I know, and many men, have experienced sexual assault of some kind. Yet somehow, the shame is projected onto the person who was attacked, while the attackers often stroll away, free.

I think that's something we need to change.

So to that end, I was interviewed on the #TakeBackYourSEX podcast, linked here, with two sexy women who've experienced rape. Megan and Tanya and I had a wonderful conversation about this - with NO shame!!

And have you seen this queen reclaiming her power? Doing a photo shoot at the frat house where she was raped, that takes ovaries.

You can listen to our discussion here.

We're talking about doing a follow-up podcast, so if you have questions or issues we didn't cover, please leave a comment, below.  Thanks!!

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

A Million to One: Tony Faggioli

Tony Faggioli is an up-and-coming writer who recently released his first trilogy, a set of action-packed thrillers with a big supernatural component running through them. And, I am proud to say, a personal friend. I'm so happy to welcome him here for the second part of a ten question interview.

6) Writing a trilogy - how do you make the pacing work so that each book works as a standalone and within the series? 

Honestly? I have no idea. I know, I know...I'm supposed to sound all cool, like I planned it all out that way, but the truth is that the story literally took on a life of its own. There were some days that my fingers simply couldn’t keep up with my brain. I was waking up at 3am or 4:30am. It was nuts. But I did have my outlines to try and mesh together. After I was done my editor cleaned up some rough patches but for the most part, it just wrote itself.

7) Critique groups and beta readers. Tell us a little about how those have helped you be a better writer - if they have. 

Each person comes to a critique group with a skill level. From there, if the group is good, that skill level will elevate. I mean, without fail. It has to. Because a good critique group is really an extension of any good writing professor you’ve ever had in your life…they keep you honest. They call you on your bullshit. They flag a character who is weak (as my group did with Tamara at first) and before long you see the reason why (she was destined to be one of the strongest characters, and as a male writer, I was struggling with how to give her a voice).

8) You auditioned several content editors for the series. Tell us how and why you selected the editor you did. 

I’d used Stephen King’s first editor to go over my prior book (The Snow Globe) so I’d already experienced an older editor who was inflexible. As such, I knew I needed something different this time. I searched and searched, and it paid off. She was young, but experienced. I wanted an editor who had spunk. Who wasn’t going to take my shit but who was also calm, cool and collected. Almost like a female Spock to my Captain Kirk. We Skype’d and she was perfect. A quick example? The ending of Book 2 used to be the opening to Book 3. She didn’t like that. She saw immediately that if I ended Book 2 the way it is now I wouldn’t just hook the reader, I would practically stick them with a fishing gaff. I went all crazy about it, ranting and raving about why I disagreed and her reply was the equivalent of, “Well Captain. That. Is. Illogical.” Except she has a British accent. I mean, can you imagine a British Female Spock? I didn't stand a chance. But guess which scene has had the most visceral reaction to date? Yep. Especially with my female readers. Most have tripped out (in a good way) but a few have been really pissed, and they DM me with anger, curse my name, cry foul…and then tell me they just bought Book 3 J

9) Every author has to balance marketing for the book(s) already released, with creating new work, while editing and revising other work. Besides coffee, what tools or mindset help you do this?

Tues-Thurs I’ve gone with a “split-day” approach. 8am-Noon I create (currently that means writing the first book of my new trilogy). Then I break for a one hour lunch. Then from 1-3pm I edit/revise (currently I’m working on The Snow Globe rewrite). From 3-5pm I monitor and check on my promos, internet stats, sales, etc. and setup TweetDeck for my next day’s content. I’m on Facebook here or there each day, so I track/post/reply as needed. Mon and Fri I can only dedicate half a day to my Indie Author cause, so I spend the afternoons editing/revising, writing my blog, putting together my newsletter and doing awesome blog interviews J

10) What question have you not yet been asked - and what's your answer? Hmmm. I guess the question would be, “How did you balance the spiritual/Christian elements of the story while targeting the mainstream, commercial thriller market?” 

Because I worked SO hard that. And my answer, “By relying on the fact that the topic of the story – the pain and consequences of love betrayed – affects Christians, Buddhists (etc) and atheists alike. The vast majority of us have this reverence for the concept of love and an innate need for it. As such, regardless of the spiritual base from which you may read the story, you can appreciate what the characters are going through."

Tony Faggioli was born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and raised in Los Angeles, California. He graduated from the University of Southern California, where he majored in Public Administration and interned in Washington, D.C. at The White House. After college, he transitioned to corporate America before deciding to start his own business. One day, he realized that nothing brought him anywhere near the amount of joy as the writing he did from grade school through high school. So, at age 35, he decided to rekindle his passion. Since then he's written four novels and begun his fifth. He's a happily married father of two kids, two dogs and a pretty awesome goldfish. 


Catch him in person at Vroman's Bookstore in Pasadena, California on Sunday, January 8 at 4 pm.  

Click HERE for Part I of this ten question interview.

Got more questions for Tony?
Ask them, below.