Monday, March 28, 2016

Say Hello To My Little Vibrator

Since my last blog post, I've been working (a lot), catching up with friends (a lot), and playing. Both with partners, and solo.

And because I have the coolest friends, I was hearing a lot of buzz about the newest toy for women, It's called The Womanizer, and is designed to replicate the feel of a partner sucking on the clitoris.

(If you landed here by mistake, and explicit sexy talk gets your Church Lady knickers in a knot, the exit is thataway. Thank you, and have a pleasantly unsatisfying life.)

I determined that I was going to blow my income tax refund (don't hate me because I already got it and spent it) on one of these fine new toys. I bought it bundled with this lovely glass dildo and carrying case, because you never know when you might want to whip out a sex toy.

It would certainly make being stuck in traffic a lot more fun. (I jest, I jest, please don't vibe and drive!)

Because I like to name my toys, and they are sexy whether together, or apart...
Meet Jean-Luc and Number Two.

Noted in passing: one of my lovers made the snarky remark that Jean-Luc and Number Two were kinda inappropriate names, since they certainly weren't going where no man had gone before!

(Pay no attention, mes petites. Rude comments aside, I have chosen to make it so.)

Here's a better picture of Jean-Luc. The small button is the on-off, the "jewel" controls intensity. 

Some of the things I discovered about Jean-Luc... Unlike other vibrators and toys, which can be protected with a condom or saran wrap, and shared among lovers, this one is one per customer. There is no way to safely wrap this device without interfering with the suction and vibrating.

I have shown it off to friends by having them wear a pair of nitrile gloves, and letting them insert a pinky finger to gauge the intensity and feel of it.

So, how did I like it? 

I used it as part of sex play with a partner, and when I hit the right spot, O.M.G. He almost had to peel me off the ceiling.

In solo play, however, I really had to be in the right mood. I found I was easily distracted.

You see, Jean-Luc becomes warm, and lights up.

You can't see the vibrating/sucking action, but you can tell by the glow, it's on.

When I turned out the light, I was like a kid with a new toy.

Fascinated. Distracted. Oooh, isn't it pretty?

Actually, it's kind of hypnotizing. The humming, the glow, the vibrating...

It was like the friggin' Eye of Sauron, luring me in...

It's a really sad thing, when you're getting so hypnotized staring into the maw of your new vibrator that you forget to actually apply the thing where and as directed.

But, I did.

So, do I recommend you spend anywhere from $150-$200 on this fine piece of German engineering? It also comes (haha) in fuchsia/snowleopard, blue croc, a couple other colors and patterns, and in Swarovski crystals (because, what doesn't, these days?), in case you're not a fan of pink/croc.

IMO, like Patrick Stewart, Jean-Luc is totes sexy enough to rock the pink/croc.

And, I am not sure I do recommend it.
I am also not sure I don't.

I believe Jean-Luc and I will need to spend much more time trekking together, before I can truly determine whether these voyages should continue. Perhaps sometimes with, and sometimes without, Number Two.

Also, perhaps, we might need to try a blindfold. Or also, Lt. La Forge's VISOR.

After all, we're doing it for science.

If you've tried a Womanizer, have you got any tips?
Your thoughts?

Monday, March 7, 2016

We've Been Waiting for The Ripped Bodice

Of course it's pink.

The first EVER bricks-and-mortar bookstore specializing in ROMANCE, is a lovely, bright pink.
The Ripped Bodice
Main & Venice, Culver City, CA
When we consider that 60%+ of the entire publishing market is romance (basically, it's the genre that pays the bills and keeps the lights on), and that there are dozens of indie bookstores specializing in mystery, sci-fi, and all those other genres, the question begs, how come romance didn't have a place, off the Internet, to call home?

Maybe it took two passionate and dedicated sisters like Bea and Leah Koch to start changing things.

I cannot express how much love I have for this mission statement.

There were all kinds of yummies to celebrate the grand opening.

And sparkling pink lemonade, too.

They put this out by the front door around four. As of when I left, about five,
I was amused to notice that NO ONE had disturbed this arrangement by taking any of the donuts.
Check out the sexy black lace panels along the top of this section!

Cute touches like this everywhere in the store!

There are many wonderful sections in this large, beautiful, well-stocked store. LGBTQ Paranormal. Cowboy Romance, Regency Romance, Historical Romance, Vampire Romance, Contemporary Romance. Young Adult, Autobiography.

But one book you won't find on their erotica shelves is a popular bestseller which also, in the judgment of many readers (including me), does not model active, informed consent. I love these women and their ethics!

Sports Romance? 

Want sports romance? So many choices!
(Note to self: Find out what Parkour is.)
Just a small part of the sports romance section.

What's a grand opening without cake?

The cake was yummy.
What else could a bookstore need? How about an inviting and colorful corner for children to sit and color, while their parents browse?

While the store is mainly books, there were also candles, bath salts, and some delightful book-related tscotches tzotckes knickknacks.

These are the adorable boxes for adorable book necklaces. If you look very close, the titles are readable!

Comfortable couches and chairs for readers to sit and dive into books? Check. Literary inspirational sayings? Check.


Can you open a romance-themed store without Fabio? Don't be ridiculous!

Even though he was holding heavy chains, Fabio was a real standup guy all evening.

Well-lit, well-appointed, centrally located in Los Angeles county, comfortable, nearby parking garage. I understand from Bea Koch that The Ripped Bodice will also be holding community events, as well as author signings, in the months to come. 

I needed more books like I need a raging yeast infection. But these all HAD to come home with me -
The Francesca Lia Block, the Tessa Dare, and the Rebekah Weatherspoon signed by the authors!
(And my receipt was PINK!)
I am sure I will be going back to The Ripped Bodice many times over the next few months. And for all the disrespect given to the romance genre (and those who read it), doesn't everybody want love? Maybe not everyone wants sex (though most of us do) - and there are "sweet" romances available at The Ripped Bodice, too.

But being cherished, valued, finding our own Happily Ever After - we all want that. And now there's a place we can find it.

Did you go to the Grand Opening?
Do you love (or loathe) reading romance? Why?
Your thoughts?