Need Some Slut Love?

Next week, this series will be back with the next Slut (and this one's not even 18!), but today I am guesting on Rebekah R. Ganiere's blog, with 3 Great Reasons To Be a Slut.



So, for those of you wondering about the dating thing... more on that, later. Suffice it to say I am finding men of interest, and vice versa. Now for a kitten update:

Picked up this little darling up from the vet on Monday night, following her spaying surgery.

I think I have settled on the name; Creativity, or Tivvy for short.  She has been someone shy at first, then a real sweetie once she gets warmed up, so Creativity seems to fit her.


But I'm not 100% sure.

The only thing I am sure if is that she is very sweet, very affectionate, very teething, and has very, VERY sharp little teeth.

So, what about the boy?

In the six weeks or so I've had him, Mojo has morphed into a sleek young teenager kitten (five months old).

His marking are gorgeous, if I do say myself (not that I had anything more to do with them than having the wit to pick him out.

Unfortunately, Mojo is twice Tivvy's size, and he wants to play with her, ALWAYS... and a little rough. After keeping them separate for most of the week, we began supervised playtime this weekend.

As you can see, while she is hiding in the bag, Tivvy is also initiating play. It has been hard for me to let her sort it out for herself, I want to protect her, but Mojo is learning to back off when she squeaks in protest.

This is from later in the weekend.

There is nothing as cute as sleepy babies - kittens, puppies, people...

And now they are learning to sleep together. Mojo's latest roughness is pinning her down and washing her face.

This time, I think it's gonna work out.

Kittens & Puppies & Mens, Oh My! (Adventures in Datingland)

I'm doing it. The dating thing.

And I am ALSO now raising two playful kittens.

Let me 'splain.

For years I was trying to find something, anything, to bring down the weight of my extremely obese cat, Metaphor, aka, Stinky. Diet pet food after diet pet food, New toys, which she would condescend to play with for three minute, then never again.

Did she LIKE the collar? No. Did she tolerate it, like so much else? Yep.

Finally it dawned on me, perhaps a playmate would encourage Stinky to move around. So I consulted experts and very carefully selected Motivation, aka, Mojo, and after the 2 week seclusion period, some extra time for him in the Cone of Shame (why can't males leave their danglies alone?!?), and some slow, supervised exposure, Stinky and Mojo seemed to be on the path to kitty friendship, if not yet at the playground.

Seems to me like she's saying, "Hey, maybe he isn't so bad, after all."

Next, Stinky got sick very suddenly, and I had to have her put down. Cue many tears, and then I was faced with a dilemma. Now I had a solo, five-month-old kitten who would be bored silly while I am at my day job all day. How can I be the best pet mommy to HIM?

Answer = Kitten #2. After crowdsourcing name ideas, I'm leaning toward Creativity, because she seems playful, but a little shy.  Tivvy for short.

About Those Puppies...

So while all of this cat drama is going on, I've signed up for the wonderful world of online dating.

While yes, the pictures I used for my profiles are more flattering than not, they're not glamour shots, photos I've seen of authors and others, which don't look anything like them, or are 30 years old. Just better lit, mostly. Here's a selfie I took last night, with the new kitten.

In my profile, I'm honest about my struggles with weight, in the first paragraph.

I put my real age right out there: [gulp] 53 years old.

I state, among other things, that I am looking for SINGLE guys, in my area, aged between 40 and 60.

So I'm getting messages from some men who actually fit that description. Yay! Also from guys who aren't local, or guys who are much, much older than 60.

I'm getting messages from skeevy married men who just want to have a sleazy affair or one night stand, on the down low.

And I'm getting very flattering messages from, I'm calling them puppies.  Here's a sampling (names changed to protect the guilty).

• Hey, how's it going? My name is Adam. I would probably be way too nervous to come up to you in person, but I just wanted to say that I think you're absolutely beautiful!  Adam, age 25.
• Would you be interested in a boy toy for the night? Ben, age 23
• I guess you can say trying to be flirty, lol. I'm open to women outside range, and am talking to several 50+ women, what can I say, y'all are a bit of fun! To be honest though, I'd be more interested in hooking up than a relationship with someone north of 40. Casey, age 30
• And I get that I am young, but age is all in the head. Mentally I connect with women in their 40s and 50s. It's who I'm attracted to. So if you can get over the age thing... lets chat.
  I am awfully good in bed so that's a huge plus right? :) Desi, age 34
• I'm not all that intimidating, honestly. I'm pretty friendly. I'm a XXX by trade. And I've dated older women before, so you wouldn't be an "experiment," as it were. Eduardo, age 25.

Seriously, I know my face doesn't scare horses or small children, and on occasion, I do feel very pretty (cue Natalie Wood's vocal stand-in).  But is it so hard for a young guy to get laid that they're hitting on an overweight woman old enough to be their mother (or, in some cases, their grandmother)?

I haven't entirely ruled out playing with a puppy, but mostly, I feel too squeamish about it.

Especially the one who is the same height, age, and NAME as my son.

Poly Want A Partner?

On the other hand... not an insubstantial number of connections I've made have been men who state they are in open or polyamorous relationships.  Messages about being home alone, while the wife is out with her boyfriend.

*blinks*

Polyamory is based on the theory that people can enjoy more than one loving, sexual relationship at the same time. (As opposed to "swinging," which is more a series of flings.)

I find I'm kind of intrigued.  In my own history, yes, this has described me. I have enjoyed - and sometimes, felt guilty about - feeling deep love and sexual attraction to more than one man at a time. Sometimes I was open about it; sometimes I was not, but I always felt worse about the secret-keeping than the sex.

Have I found "my people?" I always felt homesick when I'd finish a Robert Heinlein book that described an extended, group marriage arrangement, from Stranger in a Strange Land to Friday to To Sail Beyond the Sunset.

Research is pointing more and more to the idea that monogamy isn't the only "natural" pairing for human beings, any more than heterosexuality is.  Both may be the most popular, but they don't meet the needs of every individual. It turns out, I already knew a few poly people, and  I like them, a lot. They don't have horns or hooves or anything unusual about them, except perhaps a greater appreciation for sensuality and openness about sex. (Kind like mine.)

So, I am joining a few poly and Sex-Positive Meet-Up groups and FaceBook Groups, and have checked out a library book on the subject that was recommended to me. I'm going very slow, feeling like Bambi's mother, cautiously sniffing the air and taking one tiny, cautious step at a time, before frolicking in the meadow. We all know that Bad Things happened when she forgot.

And that's not the kind of stuffed and mounted I'm looking for.

And while I am meeting and chatting with a variety of men, I am being careful, both with my person and with my heart.

Note: If you are going to be sexting, and if you are going to be sending selfie pictures of your favorite vibrator (I would never ever sext a picture that showed intimate body parts, not even a nipple), you just might want to either delete those pictures off your phone, or move them into another folder, before you let people scroll through your phone to look at your kitten pics.  Oops!

Have you known people who were openly polyamorous?

Had unusual online dating experiences?

Your thoughts?

She Ain't Your Typical Snow White

Because who hasn't wanted to read the story of Snow White, retold where she's an amazing badass? Who hunts vampires?

Pleased to welcome to Writing in Flow bestselling author Rebekah R. Ganiere, and her book, Snow The Vampire Slayer.

Lady Snow Gwyn is tired of playing "mother" to her seven Vampire Slaying brothers. For the past two years, she's yearned to be out there fighting at their side as they hunt for bloodsuckers in the black of night. Snow is as good a fighter as any man, but she wasn't called to be a Slayer. A mere formality in her book.

 Prince Sageren, Son of Lothar has spent the last fifty years in exile, awaiting the day when he can finally avenge his family and take back his throne. Barely existing, he's forced to face his inner demons and the monster he once was, compelling him to vow to never drink from humans again. A simple enough task--until he crosses paths with a human who makes his fangs ache to drain her.

When Snow runs into Prince Sage on a late night trip to the woods, she's torn between the urge to kill him and the desire to succumb to the feeling he stirs within her. And when Snow's life is threatened by the same evil that murdered his family, Prince Sage must enlist the aid of Snow's brothers to not only help him save her life, but to also regain his rightful place as King of the Vampires.
 If Sage can keep the Slayers from killing him first.

Sounds delish, amirite? Here's an excerpt:

Run away. Run now. He wanted to scream. But he couldn’t. Drink her dry. Make her your own and you’ll never be alone again. He pounded on his skull. His gaze met hers and he suddenly lost all reserve.

One moment he was inches away, the next he grabbed her braid and forced her body against his, crushing her lips with his own. His tongue plunged deep into her mouth. She stiffened at his touch initially, but then relaxed against him. He needed this.

Her supple body pressed against his, her curves sparking every inch of his skin to wake up and pay attention. Out of sheer will, he forced his fangs at bay. He wanted her all to himself at that moment. Just her. The feel of her lips on his lips. Her tongue danced and licked his with a palpable need. Her apparent lack of experience made Sage savor her all the more.

He was dangerously close to losing control. She pushed against him roughly and he let go. Her eyes widened before hardening. Quick as light, she swung to slap him, but he caught her wrist.

“You don’t want to do that, love. You’ll split your palm open again.”

“You had no right to kiss me.”

Need pounded through him, making his body quake. He let go of her wrist. “I didn’t see you protesting too much.”

“I…I…” Her mouth opened and closed several times, but no words formed.

His gaze trained on her throat. The pulsing vein and the thundering of her heartbeat called to him. He licked his lips.

He stepped forward, gripped her arms and locked his eyes with hers. Her pupils contracted and then flooded open.

“You will go straight to the cabin. You will get your things and you will run. Run ‘til you get safe in your bed. And when you wake up in the morning, you will remember nothing.”

Her eyes glazed over and he eased his grasp on her. She picked up her sword and ran. A minute later, the light in the cabin flickered out and the door slammed. Sage didn’t dare let himself even breathe until he knew she’d gone, for fear that he would chase her down and ravish her.

When he no longer heard her footsteps, he fell to his knees and clutched the bloodied gauze she’d left behind. So long he had been in exile, underground. So long he’d denied himself the companionship of a woman. And here, in the middle of a glade, he’d found her. His heart’s desire was a human. What the hell was he going to do now?

***

Rebekah R. Ganiere is an award winning author. Her novel Dead Awakenings, debuted in January 2014. Red the Were Hunter, the first in her Farielle Series, released in May. The second book Snow the Vampire Slayer was released in September 22, 2014. And her trilogy The Society will be released Nov. 17th 2014 by Kensington's Lyrical Press.

Rebekah is the VP of Communications of the RWA FFP Chapter as well as a member of her local Los Angeles and Orange County chapters. In her spare time when she isn't writing you can find her moderating on SavvyAuthors.com or hanging out with her husband, four children and her English Bulldog, rabbit, two bearded dragons, and two tortoises. 

The escaped snake has yet to be found.

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Or, ask Rebekah a question here.

I'll be guesting on her blog next Monday, yeah, me!