Thursday, August 11, 2011

Nothing to See Here But Pictures of a Really Fat Cat

I almost said "really fat pussy" in the title.  Which would have boosted my traffic tremendously.  Prolly not the kind of traffic I want, though.  I've never had a big thing for hairy-handed, overweight guys living in their mamas' basements.  Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I am currently pouring all my brilliance into my WIP - 33 chapters down, 3 to go, woo-hoo! Gonna let the blog and all other distractions take a back seat until this baby is done.

Except the smutty story for Sommer Marsden's newbie erotica authors anthology, deadline August 31.   Which only needs a complete rewrite little polish.

So I've pushed back my Wednesday post to this, Thursday, and ain't gonna do a Friday post this week, so I can focus on the good stuff.

At least, that's the plan.  Sometimes things don't go according to plan. Like the size of my ass - and the size of my cat's ass.

My cat started out as a normal size kitten.
Simile on the left, Metaphor on the right with her little pink nose.
Kittens are SO painfully cute, and then... they grow up.

Growing, like, into the next zip code.
Metaphor, now nicknamed Stinky, just kept growing.

Until now, in the seated position, she looks like a medicine ball with a head.  
I love her, and she's got a charming personality, but it's the truth.
Even with Simile sadly gone to the bridge, and a carefully measured,
veterinary prescribed diet, Metaphor did not lose weight.

I thought exercise, like a cat tree to climb up on, would help.  Not working.
Her and me both, though admittedly, I should put more effort into exercise.

Then I realized, seeing this video of a cat who bears a striking family resemblance to Stinky aka Metaphor, that even water sports, or getting her another furry companion, or both, might not help.

Sometimes it is what it is.

That said, it's summer in SoCal, since I'm paying for a pool as part of my rent, I'm going all non-Californian and actually using it.  (If you're from California, then you know - everyone has a pool, nobody ever goes into the water.  More on that later in a flash fiction story on Karen Wojcik Berner's Bibliophilic Blather blog.  Yes, another distraction.)  Whether swimming helps shrink the size of my ass or not, I'm doing it for me.

Since they didn't get the memo about adding extra time to the clock, more time spent swimming means less time on the Interwebs.  And that's okay, because from the chatter I'm hearing, lots of other bloggers and readers are taking a break as well.

What are you doing for you, this summer (or, winter for those in the Southern Hemi)?